Thursday, September 13, 2012

Peace at last



My father finally lost his struggle with Alzheimer's. He died on September 11, of all days, bringing an extra poignance to that day.

I was prepared and totally unprepared.

Still sorting a lot of things out, but one thing that's occurred to me: I said goodbye to my Dad a long time ago. I realize now I was defining "dad" in narrow, traditional terms.

That is, he was no longer able to fill the "job description" -- answering questions about finances and household repairs and life decisions and generally being there for me and being supportive.

But, of course, he was more than the sum of his job responsibilities. And he was about more than simply fulfilling my self-interest and needs.

They should teach this stuff somewhere.

Anyway, he went fairly peacefully and, importantly, at home, with people who loved him.

2 comments:

Tina Redmond said...

My heart goes out to you.
I know the feeling of being prepared and unprepared for a parents death. I went through, hell, I'm still going through, the same thing you are after my father's death last year.
Keep your chin up and just remember that he's in a better place.

Rob Biesenbach said...

Thank you, Tina -- and my sympathies to you, too.