Humbuggin' it

I have not done any Christmas cards this year, as in the past few. (And it looks like I'm not alone. I've only received a few -- one of them from the paper carrier with a tip envelope.)

I haven't done any shopping. I haven't even made my shopping lists. (Though I have made a couple of email inquiries about wishlists.)

I haven't done any decorating. (Okay, I pulled out an old Christmas platter and put it on the table. But that's only because it's the only thing not stored away on a remote closet shelf.)

So other than a few tiny, halting steps, I have made precious little effort to celebrate this holiday season. Partly because I'm busy. But mostly because I'm just not feeling super cheery this season.

I'm impatient for things I want that I don't yet have. Visiting home -- or the place that used to be my home -- is going to be particularly stressful this year. And any great joy, love and warmth this year is going to have to come from within.

Which is the point, of course. You have to give in order to get, and I plan on striving to do some giving in that regard, but generally it's not going to be raining down upon me. It will mostly have to be ginned up by me through sheer force of will.

I think I'm mostly looking forward to getting through the holiday, getting back here and not doing anything for a few days.

Feliz Navidad!