Saturday, November 03, 2007

Decisions

I turned down that part.

These decisions are always harder than they need to be. Check that -- the decision's not so hard. It's the decision-making process that's ridiculous. Too much head, not enough gut.

One thing -- the single thing -- that makes it easier these days is I no longer feel that need to always be IN something, either performances or rehearsals for the next performance. In the past I would often take jobs for almost no other reason than the perceived need to be in something. For whatever reason -- to keep busy, to have something to say when people ask what I'm doing, fear of getting behind, or maybe just that "you never know" feeling. That is, you never know what obscure show or role you take may lead to something big -- somebody might spot you or you develop an important relationship or whatever.

Though I should also say, every show I've been in has given me something, whether it's professional or personal growth or a friendship or just a good time. I do love the process. But again, it's important not to mistake activity for action.

Anyway, onward. Yesterday I booked four auditions, so it's not like I'm doing nothing.

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